I truly feel that I need to pray for my birth mother. Growing up, she allowed me to be raped, in our home, under her nose, over a period of thirteen years – my entire childhood but even so when she leaves this world I want her to go to Heaven. That’s what’s important to me and today she is old and very lost so she needs my prayers.

I also feel that I need to pray for the man who spent those years raping me, sharing me and torturing my soul and for my only brother who was witness to some of the abuse but to this day is too cowardly to accept it and stand up for himself – stand up for what he knows is immoral, true and right.

Prayer is the only way that I can help them. Not just them but also myself. If I’m not in a place within my heart to pray for them, I cannot truly forgive them and I will not heal from the burdens in which I carry.

God tells us that if we don’t forgive others of their sins then we will not be forgiven for our own sins. He also tells us that it is through our prayers for others that we ourselves are able to grow in His love and heal, so I have to do this, not just for them, knowing they truly need it but also for my own self because I need it as well. I guess it’s fair to say that I feel convicted knowing what God wants me to do. My life is to honor Him.

© Kerri Bishop Reece | Kerri Chronicles



4 thoughts on “Convicted

  1. My mother was sexually abused by her father, she put him in charge of me when she left me in a boarding school whilst she went to live in Nigeria, in that time he abused me, not like he had her, (I did not know of her abuse at that time) and I asked her, many years later, why did you do that, she shrugged her shoulders and laughed, saying “I don’t know”. Accountability! She told me she was sure her mother knew what went on, that her sisters also had been abused by their father, my grandmother denied my grandfather did anything inappropriate to me to my face, yet years later, she was tormented by it.
    We need to shout it out, the world is full of rapists and their onlookers. Their complacency is a cancer.

      1. It is past, I don’t understand it, but I try, I try to think that the rapists and those who willfully do harm to other’s have some deep deep hidden pain of their own and I can view them with compassion, until I read stories such as your own. I feel passionately angry for those who, like you, go through years of harrowing rape.

Why hello, friend! Thanks for sharing your comments. Should you have a question, please feel free to ask it here and I'll do my best to reply promptly. Thanks for stopping by! xo Kerri