Tag Archives: Accountability

WHAT KIND OF LIGHT DO YOU, YOURSELF, SHINE ON THE WORLD?

www.kerrichronicles.com

This is so very true. As children, learning, we have poor judgement and therefore make mistakes, but we are to learn right from wrong in those mistakes, take responsibility for ourselves and mature. In this, our repeated actions, are what shape our character. They write on our slate and define who we are to everyone around us. We either choose to do right or we choose to do wrong.

You can say anything about yourself, just as others can say anything about you but it’s not what you say or what others say, it’s what you do. “Your actions” that show everyone who you are.

A person might think of themselves as frugal, but one look at their credit card statement can always tell otherwise.

The content of your character truly reveals itself through your actions and your behaviors, only.

If you say you want to spend time with someone but repeatedly fail to show up, you are communicating that you aren’t willing to follow through on your promises.

If you’re repeatedly late, you are saying “My time is more precious than yours”.

If you say you are trustworthy but repeatedly lie, you are communicating that your word can’t be trusted. You are quite simply a “liar” and at the end of the day, no one likes their intelligence insulted.

If you take what is not yours, you are a thief. No one likes a thief either.

If you say you want to change but repeatedly fail to make an effort, you are communicating that you aren’t willing to do things differently, you are happy living in the error of your ways. You are only concerned with yourself and don’t care if you hurt others.

When someone acknowledges these character traits in others, it isn’t forming judgments. It’s recognizing the facts so that they may make wise choices based on how things are—not how they want them to be.

Maya Angelou used to say, “When people show you who they are, believe them.”

It’s never your fault when someone else hurts you, but it’s within your power to stop allowing it.

If you recognize you’re being mistreated, choose to set and enforce boundaries. You can people a second chances and sometimes even a third or fourth because we all deserve that however, at that point you need to open your eyes and say enough is enough because no one has the right to mistreat you.

A genuine person shows up with honest love, they don’t mistreat you; they don’t hurt you; they don’t talk down to you and they aren’t only concerned with themselves.

My dad used to say: “Show me your friends, the people you keep and I’ll tell you who you are as an individual”. I’ve always been mindful of that and today give credit to him for the strong inner circle of friends I’ve had and maintained over the years.(You know who you are)

Everyone knows you by your true character. It’s your stamp of individuality. It’s all of your distinctive qualities rolled up into a light that either shines on the world or rolls over it like a dark, unwanted cloud. What kind of light do you, yourself, shine on the world?

www.kerrichroncles.com

 

 

Your life is your own, what will you do with it?

I love to read so when I travel I hit all the local used books stores and load up on books. I’ve had this books for quite some time but now wish I’d bought it when it was first released and paid full price because it explains my mindset and what’s in my heart, better than I ever could find the words to do.

I strongly believe that every survivor of rape in any form (sexual abuse\sexual assault\child molestation\incest, etc.) must create their own pathway to recovery. What works for one might not work for another. Therapy, medicine and counseling might be the right path for some people, but not for others. It was not the path for me. I strongly feel that unless a person has walked in my shoes, they truly cannot relate to the pain, darkness and confusion; the act of rape drapes around a sufferers soul. It’s an agony that drives the very sunshine from all of parts of life.

If you’ve ever heard me speak, had a deep conversation with me about my childhood or read my testimony, you know that above all things I recognize those that were a light for me in the midst of all the darkness. God, Paul Fazekas (my dad), Cheryl Morris Fazekas, Casey Watson, Renee Watson, Wally Hunt, Robin Foose, Mr. and Mrs. Hanson, Karen Hack, Jean Fisher, Lori Fisher, Margaret Smith, Joe Fazekas II, Richard Thacker, Tammy McNamara, Pam Arnold, Mike Poole, Christy Copeland, John Copeland, Connie Copeland, Joy Copeland, Gail Neely, Beth Posey, Cliff Loehr, Alan Holland, Kevin Humphry, David Santos, Stephanie Hall, Naomi Gold, Mike Fazekas, Daniel Fazekas, Stephanie Fazekas, Bob Hodo, Vicki Hilliard, Daniel Bradley, Drake Horton, Zoraida Cox, Janice Munoz and several others. I’ve truly had a tremendous amount of people to inspire me and I’ve never failed to say how wonderfully grateful I am.

Each of these individuals have taught me something, bestowed wisdom upon my soul, dried my tears, eased my pain, and pointed me to today and they did so, unbeknownst to them, by simply granting me their patience, showering me with love and favoring upon me true friendship full of faith, hope and optimism.

I am the person I am today because I made a choice to follow people that inspired me, individuals that were strong where I was weak, souls that fostered me up, branded me with a character of courage, integrity and honor. These spirits broke down my walls, smothered my fears, shattered my silence, and set the truth free. These individuals launched me forward, helped me make better decisions for myself, and to see my life and what I’d been through with a little more clarity.

Looking back, in the midst of all my suffering I was surrounded by very strong people. Strong people put in my path by God; and God’s people, just like Satan’s; they know their own, and they gravitate towards their own, the difference being the love they bequeath upon the world and each other. That is what God wants for all of us.

Just like my spirit, your spirit is resilient. God created us that way. He gave us the ability to forgive and to leave our past behind us, to look forward instead of back. This does not mean those at fault are not held accountable, it simply means that you choose to be grateful for all the good in the midst of all the bad, and all the good you have in life now. Its choosing to more forward, be happy and not give those that have hurt you another second of your life.

Life is a journey for us all. We all face trials. We all have ups and downs. But at the end of each day, we are masters of our own fate. We are the ones who decide how we are going to react to life. You can handicapped yourself and waste it or you can empower yourself, be grateful and love every minute of it. I encourage you to empower yourself! Truth and happiness go hand in hand. Speak it, live it and love it because every situation you find yourself in, things could be worse. Always be grateful for the good that you have!

The 13 years of sexual abuse that I suffered in my home, has enabled me to help others. I can reach out to victims and help them to learn to be happy. Because I have actually lived through what I’ve experienced, I am able to be a voice for change and I am grateful for that! I am grateful for the opportunities that I’ve had to help other people. And I am grateful for all of those that have helped me along the way!

Your life is your own, what will you do with it?

Want to read more of Kerri’s journey in healing? Check out these post:

The Essence of a Little Girls Loneliness and Pain
Love Letter to the Wounded child Inside
Toxic Family Members > God says “Walk Away”
Thank You for Causing Me So Much Pain
Toxic Family Members – 10 ways to Rescue & Save Yourself
Dear Rapist
My Mothers Legacy of Shame – An Open Letter – From Me, the Daughter She Didn’t Protect

Thank You For Causing Me So Much Pain

Dear Mom,

I’m not bitter with you, I feel sorry for you. I feel sorry that you didn’t want to be a part of my life and my successes. I feel sorry that you would rather be my biggest failure. I feel sorry that you chose a life without me in it. I feel sorry that I’ve accomplished so much in the last couple of years and you’ve heard nothing about it. I feel sorry that you have no right to be proud of me. I feel sorry that you will never be a part of my life again.  I feel sorry that I let you hurt me as badly as you did. I feel sorry that I put so much trust and effort into building a relationship with you; a relationship that you just didn’t want. I feel sorry that I had faith in you. Most of all, though, I feel sorry that you will forever feel that I’m simply not good enough.

Continue reading Thank You For Causing Me So Much Pain

The Coffee & Christ Show Talks How to Press on in Uncertain Times

Brother Fred really hits a home run with this show. Not only does he always bring in the fun but WOW he loaded us up with a great topic and made some excellent points. There are truly two kingdoms in operation — the kingdom of God and the kingdom of darkness. All ideas, beliefs, and methods of operation fall under one of these categories; there is no gray area here. Join us on this week’s episode of the Coffee & Christ show and get encouraged as we break it down and keep it real.

 

Check out more of Brother Fred on the Coffee & Christ Show:

God, Racism and Slavery on the Coffee & Christ Show
The Coffee & Christ Show Talking Truth Be Told

The Coffee & Christ Show Talks Patience